Stereotypically Liberal: questions answered and unanswered

I'm coming to realize how stereotypical my personal beliefs and convictions have become. On a recent Sunday passeggiata, a stroll home from the library which proceeded in the general form that gives this blog its name "Confident Stride," I got to thinking how predictable and, frankly, blasé my world view could be seen by others.

If I had to give a title to the meta-theme of most of my self reflective thoughts, the book would probably be called "How I almost became an Episcopalian." I'd always been an extremely religious, but never very spiritual person. While Church provided a community and friendships, there were many more people there for whom it was a continuous struggle to pretend to like, or people for whom my affection was never reciprocated. Releasing myself from seeking the approval of these two groups has added a little swagger to my "confident stride" as I no longer waste my time with people I don't like.

Two events in 2008 had a strong influence on acknowledging a growing feeling inside me that, while I would always be Catholic in a very real cultural way, I was really tired of going to church. These Events? World Youth Day 2008 in Sydney, and the 2008 presidential election. I encountered more closed-mindedness and hatred veiled as Catholic doctrine that my disappointment in my church finally boiled over. As my Catholic-themed honors thesis further demonstrated, the Church became an increasing source of frustration and target of anger.

A sucker for the ritual, music, and architecture that had marked the most important moments in my life, it was at this impasse that I could have easily wound up an Episcopalian, and just worked hard to ignore all the little things about Christianity that didn't seem to work in my world-view. Frankly, I don't believe that God has a plan for me, or that his hand is in everything that happens in my life. I'd like to take a little more credit for my own successes and failures. 'Christian family values' seem to provoke so much hatred and misunderstanding, I can't imagine that's worth hanging on to too tightly.

So today, my Sunday ritual is one of NPR and the public library. Perhaps Wednesday night fellowship services will be held at Mellow Mushroom or La Huerta- either way, spirits will be involved. My communion: fresh roasted coffee and hand-crafted beer. So stereotypical, so predictable, so white. But, for now, I'm pretty darn happy. My life is simpler, and I don't spend so much time worrying about things. I just amble around with my bag of library books and a Confident Stride. Maybe I'll go ride around on my bike and enjoy nature, however the hell it got there.

Catholic? Episcopal? Agnostic? Atheist? Methodist? Naturalist? Buddhist? Right now, I don't really care. Just don't tell my parents (happy father's day!)

To Sir, with Love

Here's an incredibly strange post for you:

I'm kind of obsessed with the Sydney Poitier movie, To Sir, With Love, mostly because I find Lulu's song by the same title to be incredibly catchy.

This week on Glee (yes, it's a good show, shut up), they performed this song, which got me listening to it again, and watching the movie (It's an Instant View on Netflix)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5qAhmuRmTY

I've been thinking a lot about the lyric "If you wanted the world, I'd surround it with a wall"

Really, it wouldn't take much of a wall to handle this job. It all depends on how you define interior and exterior, with the world being round and all. You could arguably just put a post in the ground and call the job done.

Not so great of a feat, hey Lulu??

That's all for now.

On Monumental Architecture

I just started writing one of those 'moment of insight' blog posts where I rather elegantly summed up issues of monumental architecture in three simple bullet points. And then I realized, The answer was already on the wall (literally, it is framed on my wall in perhaps the nerdiest element of my adult life). Late night readers, what I am have to share with you is the Vitruvian Triad.

Firmitas
Utilitas
Venustas

It's all there. It even works quite elegantly for architecture in the last 100 years or so. I thought I had a really great idea (Don't worry, I saved the draft of my last post, which was titled "three elements of monumental architecture"), until I realized it had already been done (Damn, isn't that just like academia?). That still counts as an insight, though, right?

Upon reflection (I have a lot of time for that these days, having finished a degree I don't want to use and being under-employed), This is what I really wanted to talk about in the flop that was my senior thesis-- issues of monumentality and cultural meaning in modern architecture. I ended up doing a project on churches (so predictable) and designing a building because I painted myself into that corner (I've since managed to escape that room, or at least take a long break from those walls).

So maybe I'll keep ruminating on these thoughts for a while longer- I've decided to take the GRE before the summer's over- It's time to move on from that whole 'my life is not going anywhere' phase...

Something to ponder: It's Modern, It's Monumental, and I think I'm in love with it:


(Image: Louis I. Kahn's Kimbell Art Museum, Fort Worth, TX 1960)

Things are slow

Things have been pretty slow the last few weeks since I'm finished with school but still unemployed. At the suggestion of a friend, I thought I'd start documenting how I'm filling my time between school and career, while I am searching for a job, and trying to figure out what to do with my life.

I've been walking to the library at least once or twice a week just to kill some time (I haven't even really been reading the books I pick up). Today, I walked to the bank and the post office, just to get out and do something and kill an hour. It's amazing how easy it is to let an entire day go by and not do anything at all. I haven't even managed to get the things done on my to-do list, since most of the items are just fillers I made up anyway.

The only thing giving me any purpose lately is my half-marathon training, which I haven't done yet today- I guess it's off to work!

Christmas lights!

Okay, I'm about 2 months late on this post. I attended the parade to open Fayetteville's "Lights of the Ozarks" back in November (it really made me feel like a town-y, I loved it!)Monica carrying a bird-puppet in the parade

Signs I'm getting older

Here are a few of the signs I am rapidly becoming an old person:

1. I wake up before 7 a.m., out of choice.
2. I have seen most of Ken Burns' PBS documentaries
3. I wear velcro shoes and cardigan sweaters
4. I listen to enough NPR to intelligently debate the interview styles of Terry Gross and Steve Inskeep.
5. I schedule my weekends around NPR shows
6. Some of my favorite films involve topics as thrilling as typeface, crosswords, and scrabble
7. I am more upset about the traffic on gamedays then I am excited for the game
8. I feel I am too far behind on technology to catch up.
9. Most Saturdays, I go to the public library to pick up books on tape.
10. I eat high fiber cereal
11. I don't own a television. My favorite forms of media: the phonograph and f.m. radio.
12. Carl Cassell is my hero.

a pointless nostalgic, that's me

I've been feeling overly nostalgic about Fayetteville lately, given the prospect that I will likely have to move away soon. Today seems like a better day to start this series of posts than any other, given that I should be working on my thesis.

They've turned on the rope-lights outlining Old Main already... can't believe it's getting to be that time of the year!